Thursday, January 29, 2004

Why do good, Godly parents sometimes lose their kids? Whether it is David, Samuel, Solomon, or someone you know, it boggles the mind. Perhaps part of the answer lies in the fact that those we call "Godly" are in really no more than whited sepulchres, outwardly seeming OK but inwardly lacking any sort of Christian integrity. This would be as much a condemnation of us as of them. Perhaps we are looking for the wrong things because we don't what the right things are. If we don't know what the right things are we ourselves are shallow.
But certainly this couldn't be said of David, "a man after God's own heart". But if he was a man after God's own heart, he certainly wouldn't lose his sons? And it couldn't be said of Solomon, who gave the Proverbs, yet his two sons split the kingdom.
The answers can be found in two things: hypocrisy and inattention.
Hypocrisy is inconsistancy with pride. Good parents admit their inconsistancy. Bad parents don't, and use their authority to cover themselves. But the children know, and the teenagers even more so. The resulting lack of respect on the part of the child causes them to become unteachable and turn against what they have been taught.
Inattention has the same effect but indirectly. If the parents are too busy to have sufficient contact with the children then effective communication cannot take place. If effective communication doesn't take place then Satan will usually always step in and mislead both the child and parent on what is really going on, creating friction and resentment. At this point the parent is working from one set of facts and the child from another, nothing gets resolved, and the child turns away.
I suspect that David, Samuel, and Solomon were guilty of inattention. If men used greatly of God can fall into this trap how is it that the soft, struggling Christians of the 21st century think they can have a two-income household and raise their children right? How is it that dad thinks he can work 80 hrs and have a good relationship with his kids? Perhaps it is possible, but the risks are so great it is akin to gambling with your child's life.

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